The story didn’t start with you. But it can change with you.
Long before your first memory, your nervous system was already adapting—scanning for danger, absorbing tension, and learning the unspoken rules of survival. Maybe you push yourself to be perfect, yet nothing feels good enough. Maybe conflict shuts you down and you don’t know why. These feelings may not have started with you.
What Is Intergenerational Trauma?
Parents pass down more than genetics and traditions. Unresolved trauma—whether from violence, migration, racism, poverty, or family dysfunction—can echo through generations. Sometimes it’s passed through silence: “We don’t talk about that.” Other times it’s absorbed through behavior: a parent’s perfectionism, vigilance, or emotional distance.
This transmission of unhealed pain from one generation to the next is called intergenerational trauma. It can affect how you respond to stress, how you love, and how you see yourself. It’s not just history—it’s what your body, mind, and relationships still carry today.
Collective Trauma Across Generations
Trauma can be deeply personal, like emotional neglect or abuse, or collective, like colonization, displacement, or systemic violence. Historical trauma—such as that experienced by Holocaust survivors, Native communities forced into assimilation, or immigrant families uprooted by war—often passes down both resilience and fear.
Descendants may carry unease, shame, or anxiety without ever having lived through the original events. For example, a parent who has experienced racial discrimination may unconsciously instill in their child a wary attitude toward authority figures. Families may teach children to remain vigilant, guard their emotions, and seek community solidarity as protection. When modern-day racism or injustice arises, it can echo the helplessness their ancestors endured, reinforcing cycles of hypervigilance.
This shared understanding of adversity creates a kind of collective memory, where descendants feel their ancestors’ struggles as if they were their own.
How Generational Trauma Shapes Self-Worth
Inherited shame, guilt, or inadequacy can become internalized, even when these emotions are not rooted in direct experience. Importantly, trauma doesn’t need to occur on a cultural or community level to ripple through families. Individual traumas—such as domestic abuse, sexual assault, or chronic emotional neglect—can disrupt family systems and shape how future generations relate to themselves and others.
How Trauma Is Passed Down
Research suggests transmission happens in multiple ways:
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Epigenetics: Trauma can leave biochemical “marks” on DNA, influencing how future generations respond to stress.
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Learned behaviors: Children absorb how caregivers handle fear, anger, or vulnerability.
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Family rules: Silence, secrecy, or “endurance at all costs” become unspoken traditions.
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Cultural norms: Stoicism, sacrifice, and productivity are often celebrated as strength but may bury vulnerability.
Signs of Intergenerational Trauma
Identifying generational trauma symptoms can be challenging because they often mimic mental health issues. They may include:
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Anxiety & Hypervigilance: Nervous system always braced for danger.
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Depression & Emotional Numbness: Shutting down when expression felt unsafe.
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PTSD & Complex Trauma: Flashbacks, shutdowns, or overwhelming reactions.
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Attachment & Relationship Struggles: Craving intimacy but fearing closeness.
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Addiction & Numbing Behaviors: Disappearing into work, substances, or screens.
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Body Image & Eating Struggles: Food and appearance tied to shame or scarcity.
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Chronic Stress & Physical Symptoms: Headaches, gut issues, fatigue.
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Perfectionism & Overworking: Fear of losing love if you fall short.
These aren’t character flaws. They are echoes of survival.
Breaking the Cycle: Healing Generational Trauma
Recognizing inherited patterns is the first step toward change. Therapy can help you:
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Connect the dots between past and present so patterns no longer run the show.
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Build secure relationships rooted in safety, not performance.
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Reparent yourself by giving your younger self the care they needed.
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Create new patterns aligned with your values.
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Reconnect with culture and identity in grounding ways.
Therapy Approaches That Support Healing
At Holistic Psychotherapy NYC, we integrate trauma-focused modalities to help clients heal:
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Trauma-Informed Therapy: Understand survival responses and restore safety.
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Somatic Therapy: Use breath, movement, and body awareness to release stress.
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Internal Family Systems (IFS): Meet protective and wounded parts of self with compassion.
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Inner Child Work: Replace silence or self-blame with care and compassion.
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Mindfulness & Meditation: Slow down the nervous system and separate past fear from present reality.
Each approach helps you reclaim the parts of yourself that trauma silenced, rebuilding trust in your body, your voice, and your worth.
Reclaiming Self-Worth and Honoring Your Story
Healing doesn’t erase the past—it reshapes its impact. When you do this work, you model something powerful:
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That safety is possible
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That worth isn’t earned
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That healing is real
This work doesn’t just honor your ancestors. It creates a new path for future generations—one rooted in connection, authenticity, and care.
If you recognize yourself in these patterns, you don’t have to carry them alone. At Holistic Psychotherapy NYC, we specialize in supporting individuals and families navigating trauma, identity, and self-worth. Our therapists integrate relational, somatic, and trauma-informed approaches to help you heal, reclaim your voice, and build a future rooted in connection. Schedule a consultation today to begin your path toward change.
